A very good question! I recently spent several months running two back to back election campaigns for the Labour Party here in the UK, while also running my coaching practice. There was all consuming, with no space for anything else.
I spent August on my allotment - which unsurprisingly had gone wild while I was on the campaign trail - and loved the calm I found there. It was also a chance to learn more about permaculture.
The space made me realise that I need to put myself first, second and third and "Reclaim My Time."
There's more to life than continually campaigning. But I do like to have a big project on the go! So, my latest passion project - inspiring and empowering women leaders in a world where they're overlooked and underestimated - is here on Substack.
My experience aligns with what you describe. I like the idea of feast or famine. For years, I proudly lived what I called “lele days” where I was more productive in 8 hours than friends were in 3 days. Those were the days.
Projects drive me. Those that have a beginning, middle, and an end….often with a deliverable in hand. Maybe it is the years of being an academic and living in the world of semesters and school breaks, but it works for me. If I can find a way to put it into a Gantt chart or a syllabus, all the better!
And, when the project ends, I forgive myself for sleeping late, binging BritBox, and lingering a bit longer on the yoga mat. Because I know the ebb and flow never stops.
I can relate to the feeling of feast or famine with life, work. I am very recently retired. I feel like I need to relearn my life, now separate from the work I had for 35 years that had very long and all consuming (but rewarding) hours and days. Let new synapses form. Yesterday I was thinking that I need to learn being important in my own life, unconnected from work. Develop a new identity in a way. This shows me that I so identified with that job and it's time to move on and put my energy into myself and my family in a way I never did or felt I was able to while working. Find abundance in my new life wherever I decide to take it. Thank you for this post. I'll be thinking about this a lot as I move forward.
Hi Debra, I think it's common for us to identify with our jobs and our work positions. It really becomes our identity. Retirement is another adjustment. Good for you for appreciating your new life! Retirement isn't an end; it's a beginning.
This! I am always struggling with wanting to do more, more, more while also wanting time for myself and my family. I think my adult kids do a better job of saying no and having balance and I’m actually learning from them. Thank you for all you do and for being a powerful example of knowing when to use your voice and when to use your heart.
Thank you for writing this essay. As for me because my story is a little different. My time was consumed with fighting for Justice for my daughter Ronique and it does become extremely exhausting but yet so important to me. I had to find a balance between the two by allowing my faith to take over. I do every now and then reach out to the detectives to let them understand that I will never stop or forget but I also have to reevaluate the course that I'm taking. I learned to put my effort into doing the things that I love more. I also took a huge leap of faith change my career objective and went back to College. I'm currently in school studying to become a Registered Dental Assistant and eventually a Dental Hygienist. Yes a totally 360! I actually love it and I look forward to working in that field. Eventhough I didn't take "a break" in work but I did give myself grace in knowing that my fight continues in my faith. I appreciate you Shannon for supporting me through it all. I look forward to reading more uplifting writings from you.
What does balance mean to me? Great question. I have a teenage daughter, so balancing motherhood and my new fine arts business is a real challenge. My life was even more unbalanced years before motherhood. I was in a horrid marriage and a horrid job situation. I had no leisure time and worried constantly.
Then I got cancer, the game changer. I left the marriage and found a better, more fulfilling job. Despite my current balancing acts, I have made time for myself and feel life is as balanced as it can be now. At least I am doing what I love.
Your story resonated with me. For most of my life I have been trying to stuff about 30 hours of “doing” into a 24 hour day. Apparently I thrive on this, and at 73 I still find I have too much to do in too little time. I’ve cut back a bit because the stress of four years as President of my women’s club, on top of my volunteer work with Moms and a PT job I took post retirement (but I love!) has stressed me too much.
But more importantly, I’m looking at my 17 year old granddaughter who seems to be taking the same path… senior class presidency, athletics, other school activities, a job, etc. I love that she is enthusiastic and involved in so many positive endeavors, but I also see how exhausted and stressed she becomes. Has my example been a good or a bad thing for her?
This is a beautiful essay. Thank you for all you’ve done for Moms Demand Action and the Harris campaign. I hope you continue to create the lifestyle that serves you well, since that will allow you to continue to be a force for good!
For me, it’s less about balance and more about how the particular configuration of activities fits for me in a given moment. To others, I know my life looks unbalanced at times, but if I’m doing all I want and need to do over time, that’s good enough for me.
I can really relate to this feast or famine I’m also a Adher and single mum of an autistic daughter so I’m super tired and reevaluating my lifetime strong desire for novelty and trying to keep it separate from my career. As when they merge I feel very chaotic. When is your book coming out?
A very good question! I recently spent several months running two back to back election campaigns for the Labour Party here in the UK, while also running my coaching practice. There was all consuming, with no space for anything else.
I spent August on my allotment - which unsurprisingly had gone wild while I was on the campaign trail - and loved the calm I found there. It was also a chance to learn more about permaculture.
The space made me realise that I need to put myself first, second and third and "Reclaim My Time."
There's more to life than continually campaigning. But I do like to have a big project on the go! So, my latest passion project - inspiring and empowering women leaders in a world where they're overlooked and underestimated - is here on Substack.
My experience aligns with what you describe. I like the idea of feast or famine. For years, I proudly lived what I called “lele days” where I was more productive in 8 hours than friends were in 3 days. Those were the days.
Projects drive me. Those that have a beginning, middle, and an end….often with a deliverable in hand. Maybe it is the years of being an academic and living in the world of semesters and school breaks, but it works for me. If I can find a way to put it into a Gantt chart or a syllabus, all the better!
And, when the project ends, I forgive myself for sleeping late, binging BritBox, and lingering a bit longer on the yoga mat. Because I know the ebb and flow never stops.
I loved your post. I’m so glad I found it!
Can’t remember where I heard this, but it has always stuck with me:
Balance is learning to live happily between effort and surrender.
I can relate to the feeling of feast or famine with life, work. I am very recently retired. I feel like I need to relearn my life, now separate from the work I had for 35 years that had very long and all consuming (but rewarding) hours and days. Let new synapses form. Yesterday I was thinking that I need to learn being important in my own life, unconnected from work. Develop a new identity in a way. This shows me that I so identified with that job and it's time to move on and put my energy into myself and my family in a way I never did or felt I was able to while working. Find abundance in my new life wherever I decide to take it. Thank you for this post. I'll be thinking about this a lot as I move forward.
Hi Debra, I think it's common for us to identify with our jobs and our work positions. It really becomes our identity. Retirement is another adjustment. Good for you for appreciating your new life! Retirement isn't an end; it's a beginning.
Sounds like you are doing a needed self evaluation. Good luck on that journey. It is part of life and it sounds it is needed. Best wishes.
Informative
This! I am always struggling with wanting to do more, more, more while also wanting time for myself and my family. I think my adult kids do a better job of saying no and having balance and I’m actually learning from them. Thank you for all you do and for being a powerful example of knowing when to use your voice and when to use your heart.
Thank you for writing this essay. As for me because my story is a little different. My time was consumed with fighting for Justice for my daughter Ronique and it does become extremely exhausting but yet so important to me. I had to find a balance between the two by allowing my faith to take over. I do every now and then reach out to the detectives to let them understand that I will never stop or forget but I also have to reevaluate the course that I'm taking. I learned to put my effort into doing the things that I love more. I also took a huge leap of faith change my career objective and went back to College. I'm currently in school studying to become a Registered Dental Assistant and eventually a Dental Hygienist. Yes a totally 360! I actually love it and I look forward to working in that field. Eventhough I didn't take "a break" in work but I did give myself grace in knowing that my fight continues in my faith. I appreciate you Shannon for supporting me through it all. I look forward to reading more uplifting writings from you.
Stay Blessed,
Nicole Gardner
Excellent post, Shannon!
What does balance mean to me? Great question. I have a teenage daughter, so balancing motherhood and my new fine arts business is a real challenge. My life was even more unbalanced years before motherhood. I was in a horrid marriage and a horrid job situation. I had no leisure time and worried constantly.
Then I got cancer, the game changer. I left the marriage and found a better, more fulfilling job. Despite my current balancing acts, I have made time for myself and feel life is as balanced as it can be now. At least I am doing what I love.
Your story resonated with me. For most of my life I have been trying to stuff about 30 hours of “doing” into a 24 hour day. Apparently I thrive on this, and at 73 I still find I have too much to do in too little time. I’ve cut back a bit because the stress of four years as President of my women’s club, on top of my volunteer work with Moms and a PT job I took post retirement (but I love!) has stressed me too much.
But more importantly, I’m looking at my 17 year old granddaughter who seems to be taking the same path… senior class presidency, athletics, other school activities, a job, etc. I love that she is enthusiastic and involved in so many positive endeavors, but I also see how exhausted and stressed she becomes. Has my example been a good or a bad thing for her?
This is a beautiful essay. Thank you for all you’ve done for Moms Demand Action and the Harris campaign. I hope you continue to create the lifestyle that serves you well, since that will allow you to continue to be a force for good!
For me, it’s less about balance and more about how the particular configuration of activities fits for me in a given moment. To others, I know my life looks unbalanced at times, but if I’m doing all I want and need to do over time, that’s good enough for me.
I can really relate to this feast or famine I’m also a Adher and single mum of an autistic daughter so I’m super tired and reevaluating my lifetime strong desire for novelty and trying to keep it separate from my career. As when they merge I feel very chaotic. When is your book coming out?